Throughout life I’ve learnt the value of investing in good quality when it comes to possessions.
But is the same true for the intangibles of life – our mind and thoughts?
It’s worth considering whether investing in our mental and emotional well-being with the same level of care and attention can also lead to long-term benefits.
The saying ‘buy cheap, pay twice‘ is often spoken in our house when we’re considering options for something new. In fact, this was taught to me as I was growing up. A couple of things that come to mind are owning a car that’s reliable so won’t be the cheapest, and buying clothes that will last – M&S jumper anyone?
Over the years it’s become apparent to me is that there is less value attributed to investing in your mind. People pay a good deal of money to have their hair cut, coloured and styled, or nails manicured and painted, than they would ever consider on talking therapies. This glaring omission, is, in my opinion, a fundamental flaw in the way we’re educated and how many live their lives.
I don’t think this is a realisation I’ve found since reaching the my midlife and perimenopause, but I certainly see it clearer now.
If you follow my social feeds you’ll know my favourite hashtags are #enjoythejourney and #liveyourbestlife.
These are so deeply ingrained in me and how I live. I really am enjoying my journey through life, living life in ways which bring me happiness and please me. I know there’s only one shot at life and don’t wish to waste time on stuff I’m not interested in just because it’s expected of me. The people pleaser attitude I once bought into blindly has had her eyes opened and knows what is good and right for me. And for me that means I don’t waste time or money on unimportant things.
There are many things you choose to invest in, either with your time or your money. What I’ve found is that there are two broad categories:
1️⃣ ‘things’ – possessions, items, physical stuff which we believe and hope will bring us joy (material possessions)
2️⃣ ‘self’ – you, your mind and your values – self-care activities, reading for pleasure or learning, therapies, coaching, hobbies, adventures and experiences that push us out of our comfort zone, time with friends and family.
Sadly, the investment in things usually far outweighs that of the self. The chase of happiness through obtaining more and more material things is something I no longer buy into.
It is my belief that chasing after happiness solely through material possessions isn’t a worthwhile pursuit. Stuff doesn’t bring you happiness, nor does money. Happiness is found in your mind, how you think, act and behave from moment to moment, daily, and consistently every day.
To find contentment on a daily basis you need to live in the present moment. However, to do this, you must be willing to put in work, consistently, and know that you are living your best life. You have to be committed to learning about your mind and emotions so you can become the best possible version of yourself.
Ask yourself these questions. I invite you to get your journal and spend some of your precious time thinking deeply:
❓ What am I investing in? (on things, or on me? chasing happiness through things? on self-development?)
❓ Where do I want my focus to be? (e.g. having more or being better, being happier, on just ‘being’)
❓ Are there any changes I wish to make?
The value of investing in your self is actually invaluable. I wish we were ingrained with the ethos of putting money and time into learning about yourself.
We literally only have ONE LIFE, ONE BODY and ONE MIND. So why not invest in these over that latest ‘whatever’?
A common reason I hear from people about why they don’t invest in coaching is because it’s seen as a luxury, and is an expensive investment. However, this perspective can be limiting and prevent you from unlocking your full potential.
Let’s look at some figures:
My 3 month coaching packages start from £1250.
If you were to divert some money to your self-development, rather than on things, how would that add up?
Let’s use booze as the example.
Just so it’s clear, this is just a concrete example, not a speech about how to live your life or that booze is bad.
Perhaps you have a bottle of wine 2 or 3 times a week. A decent bottle is about £18, x3/week = £54; multiply by 12 weeks (3 months) = £648
That’s over half your investment in a 3 month coaching package.
And the reality is, when you go out at the weekend you spend far more than £54 on a single evening. There’ll be dinner, a train or taxi ride, that late night snack because you have the booze-munchies, the hangover cures you need. It’s easy to gloss over the hidden costs but they add up.
And you know what. The wine has been drunk and is gone. You can’t get that same wine back, ever.
The lessons and insights you get from coaching last a life time and you continue to learn and develop from the time you have invested.
Investing in your mental and emotional well-being has lasting benefits far beyond the hours you have with a coach:
- Improves self-awareness and emotional intelligence: you better understand your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. This increased self-awareness can help you make better decisions, navigate difficult situations, and build stronger relationships.
- Builds resilience and coping skills: you develop coping strategies for managing stress and adversity, which can improve your ability to bounce back from setbacks and maintain your well-being.
- Increases confidence and self-esteem: through setting and working towards (and achieving) goals, you develop a sense of competence and confidence that can translate into other areas of your life.
- Enhances communication skills: you improve your communication skills, which can have a positive impact on your personal and professional relationships.
- Provides a supportive and non-judgmental space: coaching provides a space for you to be vulnerable and share your thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment. This can help you build trust and develop deeper connections with others.
- Increases overall life satisfaction: By investing in your mental and emotional well-being, you can improve your overall quality of life, leading to greater satisfaction and fulfilment.
Overall, investing in your mental and emotional well-being can have far-reaching benefits that extend beyond the time you spend working with a coach. It can help you build resilience, confidence, and stronger relationships, and ultimately lead to greater satisfaction and fulfilment in all areas of your life.
I’d love to hear where you invest your time and money. Please get in touch to share your thoughts.
ps. I’ve had to temporarily turn off commenting on posts as I’ve been bombarded with 100s of spam comments…I’m in the process of resolving this but in the meantime email me with your thoughts: firstname.lastname@example.org
Adopting better habits and thought patterns can help us accomplish far more than we feel is possible. Coaching conversations are an opportunity to learn about yourself and your experiences. You have the space and time to explore what keeps you stuck, unfulfilled and not living aligned to your values. If this sounds like something you’d like to look into take a look at the Services I offer or get in touch to arrange an initial free and informal chat.